Something I deleted but should never have deleted.

MONDAY, 16 JANUARY 2012

I'm still at Art School. Sometimes I wonder how it is possible - there have been many times when I have seriously considered giving up. We got given some grades on the first day of the new term. I can't help take umbrage with some of the grading as I feel, some people who have been given distinctions are producing gash. It is contentious to say this. To admit it to students, teachers and here on my blog probably won't make me any friends, but what are we meant to draw from it? There are students who struggle away, genuinely going through inner turmoil through the term trying to find the right medium and trying to marry their physical creations with their ultimate message. There are some that seem to be charlatans. Barely turning up or appearing to struggle in any way, who come out smelling of roses. There is also the question of taste. Some of what is being produced and graded well, seems awful to me. Cliche ridden and unoriginal. And some seem to be doing exactly what they were doing last year... and still doing really well!

Having initially got upset last week, I have 'squared' it this weekend. Some of the work I think should have done better is more complex than the rest, dealing with issues such as political activism in China.. or memories of a conflicted childhood. But complexity is not a bad quality. Surely, in the long run it will serve you better than work which is more transparent?

The tutors feel we should not 'worry' about the grades we get.. how unlikely is that?　

Have decided from here on in to do work I enjoy making, and get pleasure from this making, and ignore everything outside of that... trying to 'look good' to the tutors (i.e. making sure you're always in, and always working), trying to keep avid diaries on your processes (no one reads them anyway). May as well just be completely selfish about it. Afterall, when you're paying £2,500 a year to be there, the least you can do, is allow yourself to enjoy the experience. Screw the grading criteria.

When one blog closes...

I'm not going to update this blog anymore. I'm moving to a new shiny blog to mark my move from college to fully qualified bona fide artist. You can now find me here

*link removed*

I will leave this blog to gather dust on the shelves of the world wide web. A footprint in the virtual sand.

New exhibition

I am totally on the look out for somewhere to show my paintings. I recently saw Joe Webster's work at Boston Tea Party in Exeter, and it inspired me to try and get some of my languishing work back up on walls. Its not gonna sell wrapped in plastic leant up behind the tv. I've inquired at Boston. If anyone actually reads this, and can think of somewhere else locally that needs a few lively, beautiful images on the walls, please let me know. Cheers! :)

Hugh M. Davies

As part of my dissertation research I have come across a book on installation art, with an introduction by Hugh M. Davies, Director of the Museum of Contemporary Art, San Diego. It makes many ingenious points - chiefly that ambitious 3 dimensional art is actually a return to the first kind of art - cave paintings. He also says it is a travesty that while 2 d work sells, the bigger stuff struggles, but that is where the real experiments are taking place. Sorry painters! ;) I really recommend the book - 'Blurring The Boundaries'. Here's one of my favourite quotes: 'Whatever aesthetic bounty experimental artists bag rarely translates into trophy art to hang above the mantel that is likely to turn a tidy profit. "We got in on the Schnabel thing early, snagged a player piece for nothing before the Boone happened, Hung on until the Whitney begged for it, and then turned a tidy profit on the appreciation when the tax window opened. Julian's delighted and so are we. Nifty, this art business." As opposed to... "Gee honey, what would we ever want with an earthwork?, we don't even use the swimming pool."

May Installation

I never really posted any images off of May. I was very proud of what I produced in the end, an installation I'm calling Legacy. It's very personal in subject matter. I hope it will take on another life in a different exhibition. I entered Exeter Contemporary Open for the first time this year. I may also enter the Wells Contemporary Open, which closes in a few weeks, note to self. I think this work deserves another outing. It's top drawer. All puns intended and copyright of the artist.

Crazy Little Thing Called Art

Like last summer, I find myself once again using my spare time to try and make further head way in understanding this crazy mass of relationships, events and history they call the art world. I have been reading 'The Turner Prize and British Art', published in 2007 by Tate. A few chapters took my fancy, but I particularly enjoyed one discussing the phenomenon of prizes in the cultural world, in which Mark Lawson, Grayson Perry and Lionel Shriver bat some thoughts about. I'd like to quote some snippets from it because they seem particularly articulate on the state of things.

GP (The Turner Prize) is contemporary art, yes. Alan Bennett said that there should be a sign outside the National Gallery, saying, you don't have to like everything, and I think that is something that needs to be rammed home again and again to people. You know, come to the Turner Prize, you might like none of it, you might like all of it. People don't feel qualified to discern because it's an alien language to them. The art world has its own language, and all contemporary art, to some extent, even if it's rebelling against it, is addressing the 'lingua franca' of contemporary art. I think you're a fool if you ignore its existence, because it's like someone going to France and shouting in English... You have got to acknowledge that contemporary art has its orthodoxies now. It has its history and its way of doing things. You pick up a kind of thought process of people in the art world from living around it for decades, because it's very isolated. It's not like the literary world where you have to take into consideration popularity, because the people who buy art are insiders on the whole. Most of the collectors want to be part of the difficult - now slightly glamorous - world of art. So in a way it doesn't matter what the public think. They can come along and look at this prize and say, rubbish. The only people who want it to be popular are museums. They want footfall.

ML You talk about centuries of approval and disapproval that have gone into great works of art. I have this argument with people from the Mail and the Telegraph all the time, because it seems to me amazing that they don't realise when they say filth in the Turner Prize or whatever, that middle-class favourites, for example, Judi Dench in Chekhov or Ian McKellan in Strindberg, were just as controversial at first. I mean there were literally riots on the first nights of these plays. Ibsen was accused of bringing sewage out of the streets into the theatres. There doesn't seem any acknowledgement of the process that most art is going to be against the middlebrow conventions of the time, if it's going to be any good.


I know its not quite what Mark Lawson is talking about, but I find it interesting that within my little year group at college, the people whose art I really objected to, only 6 months ago, are the people who actually now inspire me to 'go further'. As for Grayson Perry's argument, I usually use a similar analogy myself when explaining to people that art has its own language, that you really need to be versed in, before you can make an informed opinion. And actually its a bit arrogant to think that any tom, dick or harry, can take it at face value and write a letter of disgust to the Sun about it. I usually use the analogy of wine though. I can say I don't like the taste of a particular bottle... but it might be considered the best by a wine buff... something like that.

Some Images To Complement The Words...

These images won't make sense out of context, but they all demonstrate my style.. pretty versatile.. pretty lo-fi, and pretty cerebral!

...And Down We Go Again...

I never knew this career path would involve so much struggle, both internal & external. There's the struggle that goes on in the studio, documented in the sketchbook, as you try and unravel and tap into your ideas and logic. Then you've got the fact that trying to find out how to make a living from Art is like trying to find the holy grail. I mean man cannot live on fine ideas and beauty alone. I don't want to be an artist that sells little knick knacks for £30 each at the annual open studios. I want to be the artist having a major show in London :/

Re-Inspired, Phew!

After a week of feeling a bit deflated about the direction I am going in, I feel re-inspired, hurrah! I had fallen into a familiar groove of questioning whether the Fine Art degree was a total fool's errand. I know I am getting into debt and I'm never quite sure if its going to 'pay off'.  This doubt and introspection commonly occurs when you are rudely kicked out of college for these periods they call 'holidays'. Without the everyday structure, you suddenly slip into DOOOOOOOM!, wondering whether you should just go and get a job at the local electricity firm like everybody else. And maybe get a house on a new build estate. And maybe start wearing a tie. Anyway, a quick look today at the various Arts jobs bulletins around has reassured me that getting a Fine Art degree can only be a good thing, and that I still have the work experience accrued before returning to University. And even if I have to start at the bottom of the pile next year when I graduate, I will only be 33, which isn't really that old (is it? is it?), not in this day and age. And actually 33 is pretty early to find yourself where you want to be. I think in general, I need to weather set backs a bit better, and keep in mind my long term goals. Just don't ask for any great detail on what they are. Fuck wearing a tie.

2nd Year, End of Year Show, Work in Progress

Thought I would take a minute to post about what I'm working on in the studio. I began the term, thinking about notions of loss and family. I attended my grandad's funeral in January and was interested to learn that he had been a draughtsman. On top of this, one of the readings at the funeral was an extract from one of my Dad's plays. My Dad has had Dementia since he was 50 so has long since become divorced from the person he once was. There are three strands of work currently in development in the studio which attempt to digest these ideas.. of heritage.. loss.. the 'fleeting-ness' of life, and how any truth about life can be so hard to pin down. Just when you've made an attempt to process it, it gets away from you again. I have been creating a sculpture by shredding a variety of fresh and found materials - remnants of fabric from my own stash and bought in from fabric shops, and flotsam and jetsom collected on walks around Exeter. The idea is that this pile of matter could be tucked into edges and corners at the exhibition, maybe where the wall meets the floor, or up and down the staircases. Another piece of work involves projecting a blurry photograph of this matter in situ. I may even try and get the projector to shake, emphasising this sense of the fleeting and elliptical nature of life. The third strand is some 'poetry'. Quotes from other artists and writers, text messages, random thoughts and graffitti created in moments of frustration. When all this text work has simmered down, I hope to have some concise words to intersperse with my objects for an installation.

End of Year Show, May 2012

Great week! Knackering and up and down as ever but I'm getting a lot of energy from the fact our end of year exhibition seems to be coming together. We've found a venue and have visited it a number of times over the past week. There are three empty buildings in a pedestrianised area of Taunton town centre. They have been furnished for use as offices, so there are hairy blue carpets, those nasty vertical blinds and strip lights in odd aluminium shells.. but it has great natural light, is not too overlooked by other buildings, is in a central location and for the past two weeks has been home to an arts project which has created a lot of local interest. There are three floors to each building and some interconnecting doors between them, meaning a potentially interesting, labyrinthine experience for the audience and a real opportunity for the curators and artists.

Today, our year group attended the wrap up session of the lively arts project that's been taking place in said buildings. Artists have been inhabiting the space, and interacting with the community with the aim of formulating a vision for some kind of arts establishment in Taunton. They also canvassed opinion on what the community think of recent regeneration plans. During this occupation, young people have had the opportunity to make films and music, and passersby have been able to 'get creative' using the resources set up by the artists.

Hopefully some of the ideas generated by the project will feed into future action through the town council and the various arts organisations already in existence in Taunton. Better partnership working and more focus on shared agendas was definitely being advocated today. For example, an arts diary for Taunton was suggested.

For us students, we now have three and a half months to make some work for the show. Can't wait!

Here are some shots of the location, just to give a feel :)

It has been great to meet Nic Brace, a passionate musician and arts facilitator and to continue to work with Tim Martin, the arts bod at the Brewhouse.

Saatchi

I'm not usually that modest when it comes to my art. I figure you've got to just go for it and see what happens (hopefully something!). However have just been looking at Saatchi Online where you can upload your work and sell it and I feel well intimidated! I wonder if there is somewhere a little less prestiguous for artists who are not quite that confident...

I have taken a lot of pictures of my paintings today, trying to get some professional looking shots. I have uploaded them in the Gallery section, check out the link above.

The plan is to put them all on there. Something to add to the to do list!

Emancipation

Today I came across a snippet from a diary, written 100 years before I was born (1879). The lady writing the diary had moved to Paris hoping to become an artist. Here's what she wrote:

What I long for is the freedom of going about alone, of coming and and going, of sitting in the seats of the Tuileries, and especially in the Luxembourg, of stopping and looking at the artistic shops, of entering churches or museums, of walking about old streets at night; that's what I long for; and that's the freedom without which one cannot become a real artist. Do you imagine that I get much good from what I see, chaperoned as I am, and when, in order to go to the Louvre, I must wait for my carriage, my lady companion, my family?

It's easy to take for granted some of the liberties we have today. Freedom is an important condition for the artist. This morning I went out and collected flotsam and jetsom in a bag. I don't think this lady would have been able to do that!

British Art Show 7, Plymouth

The British Art Show 7 will be showing at Peninsular Arts in Plymouth until 7th December. Somerset College students have the chance to submit a piece of work, to be shown at another venue, in response to the key themes of the exhibition.

I'm hoping to show a piece I made last year. I had recycled some of it for a new sculpture, so I've had to recreate it. It's a structure made out of wood, with the text from two genuine SMS messages in two of the 'cubicles'. It can generate lots of different interpretations. The cubicles are analogous to days and also mobile phone screens. I used wood, because its a material with warmth and history. The materials our personal, electronic devices are made out of are much 'colder': metal, plastic and circuit boards. We've been asked to submit 50 words. See below.

‘Heart On My Sleeve’, 2011, Mixed Media

My piece is about the passing of time and the fluctuations of relationships. It's also about how reliant we are these days on technology, conducting much of our communication via devices, like mobile phones and computers. The themes I relate my work to are 'the order of things' and 'parallel realities'.

Update

Spent today, 25.11.11, down at Royal William Yard in Plymouth where we had our show. Its a really lovely area - a former naval victualling yard, which has been developed into a mix of studios, restaurants and businesses. The views across the sound are stunning and the weather was great today.

  

                                                                                                                                                                              

The show was inside the Mills Bakery building, unfortunately a bit too tucked away to make it easily accessible to the public. Still, the unit was very nice and it was interesting to see the work of other colleges. Also, when your work's up amongst that of your peers you get to see how loudly or quietly it resonates and whether you want to tweak your aesthetic or not. I felt my work came off pretty subtle. Maybe I'll make it a bit louder for the next show.

 

Wise words from John Berger.

Here is a quote from Episode Four, Ways of Seeing, which I watched today, in which Berger tackles the subject of advertising.

In our urban world, in the streets where we walk, in the buses we take, in the magazines we read, on walls, on screens, we are surrounded by images of an alternative way of life. We may remember or forget these images, but briefly, we take them in, and for a moment they stimulate our imagination, either by way of memory, or anticipation.


But where is this other way of life? It's a language of words and images which calls out to us wherever we go, wherever we are.


Where do they exist, these fabulous rewards and objects and people? Where do they belong to? Here? There? or Nowhere?


They come with us everywhere. We take them away in our minds. We see them in our dreams.

To me this says, the world depicted in the glossy adverts in our sunday papers and between our tv shows.. doesn't really exist.. otherwise we'd know someone who lived in that world and do you? Do you know anyone with the looks of a model, who is impeccably styled while simply sipping an expresso in their fabulous home, a slight smirk of knowing superiority on their faces? No? Thought not.

Sloppy research..

This summer, I'm having so much more fun just looking into names dropped during an end of term lecture, rather then trying to digest a horrendous reading list which features vocabulary such as.. psychoanalysis.. semiotics.. I would go on, but it sends a chill down my spine!!! Through this alternative research, I have encountered Marina Abromovic and John Berger.

Alternative review of Tracey Emin's show, live from The Hayward.

Thought it might be interesting to just download my thoughts on the Tracey Emin show, without any editing, verbal diorrhea style, a la our heroine. Here's what I wrote: Very confessional. Does not try 2 rationalise thought. Some of the illustrations, words are back to front. They are a certain kind of print I think - monoprint. Sex obsessed. Enjoys her own pain? Feels she is fated to be alone. Sex as a divine experience. Autobiographical. Re. the pier sculpture, you can't actually reach the cabin, it remains an idea, a fantasy. I like 'Is legal sex anal?'. Turkish culture. Nice to see Tracey happy in 'Why I never became a dancer'. Makes me feel I'm not having enough sex. Her past catches up with her. Men (the local men in Margate) hate her.. even though they've all had sex with her - the contradiction - she's a slag for sleeping with them.. what are they? She's always trying to get her revenge on Margate. Exhibitionist. Hard hitting, stuff about abortion. Appreciated 'When you're sad you only see sad things'. True. Combination of words and objects in pieces like 'Wimsey', 1972-2003, is effective. Super 8. She's a twin! Conversations with my mum, 2001, explores generation gap between the artist and her mum. Her mum didn't think Tracey would be a good mum. "You wouldn't be where you are today dear.." (if you'd had children). Tracey: What if I get to a point in my life where I get bored with the narcissism?..where I want to see the world through someone else's eyes?.." Mum: "I don't want to see you tied with children" (like she was) On childbirth: "You never forget that pain".

By the time I've come full circle round the gallery, and am watching 'How It Feels', which incidentally, I think is one of the most effective pieces and holds a lot of clues to Emin's motivation as an artist, she's starting to resemble a bo-selecta mask. Bravado. Denial.

Performance Art

Have been obsessively watching a video on MOMA's website. My tutor mentioned Marina Abromovich during an end of term lecture, so I sought to find out more about her. I have discovered she is a legendary performace artist and that last year, MOMA held a retrospective of her work, which included the re-performance of many of her iconic pieces, and a new piece, called The Artist is Present. Performance artists re-performed her work, but Marina herself took centre stage for TAIP. What is compelling about the video, for me, is that it illuminates the world of performance art. All the artists  introduce themselves, and explain what else they do, outside of this project. There are dancers, singers, choreographers, directors, writers, and actors. A bohemian, raggle taggle mix of freelance workers who are passionate about what they do and get by by hook or by crook. All of them have the 'presence' and stamina needed to perform the work. They talk about the experience of performing, including the discomfort sometimes endured, and how transforming it can prove to be. In her new performance, Marina sat opposite volunteers and stared into their eyes, 7 hours a day for 3 months. It caused a lot of debate in the media, and bought Performance Art back under the spotlight.

I would really recommend watching the video, here is the link: http://www.moma.org/explore/multimedia/videos/108

Foundation Year Project, 2007

In 2007 I made three paintings for the final major project (FMP) at Abingdon & Witney college. The paintings were inspired by London. I felt the atmosphere on the underground had changed following the 2005 terrorist attacks. An environment that was already pretty dingey had become darker. I had this image in my head of this train hurtling towards me. You could see the front of the train, and a diminishing platform. The lights of the train were bright but it was enshrouded by darkness. To 'exorcise' this vision, I made 100 paintings. Some quite small and some minimal, all externalising the motif. In order to evoke the properties of a tube tunnel, I used organic substances - sticky honey and dusty charcoal. This meant that once the paintings went into storage, they went mouldy! However, the mould is quite beautiful, and quite fitting, reminiscent of rust and damp.

Some of the preparatory paintings/drawings:

The final paintings:

Here are some close up shots of the surface taken in bright sunlight.

Dispatches from Art School

Work from the first term at Somerset College of Art and Technology.

This was some work about frogs. I can't really explain it. I found a dead frog under the recycling bin in my mum's garden. I thought maybe it said something about human intervention in the natural world, i.e. the frog had come to rely on the shelter of the bin, and when the bin men moved it, they crushed him. I made lots of frogs out of illuminous play-doh, TM. I stretched them and photographed them in natural surroundings and surreal scenarios. Eventually the bits of frogs dried up and I displayed them on some specially made shelves.  

These are some close ups of work produced in a 2 day drawing workshop run by sculptor and tutor Graham Seaton and painter and tutor, Stewart Geddes. The idea was to loosen us up - get us to over-ride our natural drawing habits. It was a good day. I don't think I quite let go enough, but given the opportunity again I wouldn't be so conventional. There were students stabbing their paper or painting with their feet. I just enjoyed making pretty patterns.